#1The Monologue
Immigration and Customs Enforcement announced it will spend up to two million dollars on robot dogs — which will be used for inspection and situational awareness, and which, unlike a real dog, cannot be bribed with a hot dog... so at least one avenue of due process has now been closed. Re: [NBC News]
OpenAI says it will cut off the coding tool Cursor after SpaceX bought its parent company for sixty billion dollars — so the world's most advanced artificial intelligence companies have finally reached the stage of technological development where they stop letting each other sit at the lunch table. Re: [CNBC]
The U.S. Open has expanded into a third week, at the same time players are publicly complaining that the tennis season is already too long — organizers listened carefully to those concerns, thought about them seriously... and then added more tennis. Re: [The Washington Times]
Vernal, Utah gathered 804 people in dinosaur costumes on Main Street during its Dinah SOAR Days festival, breaking the Guinness record for the largest gathering of people dressed as dinosaurs. The previous record of 682 was held by the University of Calgary.
Boise record-breaker David Rush stacked 254 rolls of toilet paper on his forehead and held them for one minute and twelve seconds, beating his own Guinness World Record. Rush holds more than 200 record titles.
A tree-covered island measuring more than 105,000 square feet appeared in the Williston Reservoir north of Mackenzie, British Columbia, then drifted off and vanished. Officials say floating debris islands are a known phenomenon on the reservoir.
The Oroville Fire Department in Butte County, California was dispatched to what was logged as a bird stuck in a tree, and found a pet macaw that had been stranded on a high branch for several days. The bird was brought down safely and returned to its owner.
#7The Groaner
What do you call a dinosaur with an extensive vocabulary? A thesaurus.
